Our wedding day morning, sunny and warm. Things are going well. The most important thing in my life time is coming. I wear a mother for me personally sewn beautiful silk dress, the heart is filled with joy and plans for the future.
However, at this moment, of hangovers father stagger approached me. Yes, this time, each bride is not without a father walked arm in her hand, put her hand to the groom. Father mouth exhaled liquor smoked I was almost suffocated, he reached out his hand rolled up my arm when unexpectedly nearly stumbling. Meanwhile, the wedding march "ring - is moving forward to go.
I tried to disguise, put on beautiful smile, stretching holds up my father, and do not let him fall. Is supposed to be a father walked me, but now I was wear his body forward. Every step he took them stepped on my long skirt hem of, let me constantly make with him. Until I was holding the groom's hand standing at the altar, for me, the most important part of the wedding has to corrupt away. I am angry, inner received great damage. Good heavens! At that moment I decide to never forgive my father.
In my memory, since I was a little girl on, father is a "alcoholic". His drink to our family influence is too big, his bad habits are constantly upgrade, finally one day led to his mother and the breakdown of her marriage.
That day I saw dad took him all things are loaded into the car. I don't believe he really leaving us, ask a way: "father, where you want to go?" He told me, "I found a job in the city, have to go there lived a period of time, however, I'll be back soon." He came over to hug me, a kiss on the forehead.
My heart keeps a child's hope, because one day it will be home. But, he never came back.
After that, every Saturday I take my younger sister and his together again. I wish I could say those days are happy, but in fact, mostly those days spent in waiting. We sat in the car, because my father was going to pubs "make some calls". To him I grudge accumulate the deeper, and sustained growth, and finally, on my wedding day that reached the peak.
I'll never forgive father's decision lasted for 3 years, until gave birth to his son, I began always renenber father, and began to father mind at rest. I love my child, I've brought him a endless happiness. I saw my husband as well as I, he kept hold son, gently to kiss him, for he sing a lullaby. I suddenly think of my father, my hour hou he is also loves me. I can't help era, earned my cruelty. I overlooked no father wouldn't have my facts, and not how can I have my son? How have the arrival of the son brings us great surprise? This surprise to exist in our life! And I was never loved for his father, without gratitude. Such a thought, I realized that his father's alcohol but is a kind of disease, and I of his father's illness, how can resentment how can ignore whatever? I really can't forgive myself. From the first born son 20 days since, I started to "track" father - often drunk in a great mess of his frame to my car back to his apartment.
Father 61 years old birthday coming, I go for him to clean the room, are catching up with his booze-besotten drunk to sleep in bed. Give him change new sheets, I used sufficient strength to carry him up on the floor, but she didn't know it was tall father unexpectedly so light, embrace him because I think that he wrenched the fadeaway go, my father and I together to the ground in a heap. He was cast awake, tears a planet orbiting a land flowing; leaching loss finalise my arms. I also in tears, we together silently cry for a long time. That day when wanting, I tell father: "unless you give up drinking, otherwise you will immediately not live to put your daughter personally ask for her groom the day!" At that time apart from my sister's wedding and six months. This is the first time I got married three years to father spoke.
The next day, the father of doctors would have telephoned me, saying that my father lived in a detoxed center. I immediately put this good news to tell the sister of his approach, we feel heartfelt gratified.
One day, his father doctor told me on the phone: "don't expect miracles, your father retired, living alone, and have many years of excessive wine history. He will relapse!" I told the doctor: "no, I never let my sister's wedding repeat my wedding that embarrassing occasion, I want to let father left drinking center with me after live together, I believe the miracle appear."
Finally one day, incredible things happened. Father in detoxed center phoned me, and asked him whether he can meet my alone. When I arrived at drinking center, at his side, he said the first word is: "I is I give you and other family members bring all the pain sorry. I know I don't have a few years to live, but I hope that in the rest of the day, I can awake alive." Father pull up my hand, look in my eyes, and asked: "can you forgive me?""Yes!" I don't hestitate ground to say, "I'll forgive you, dad, also please forgive me, I never cared you, no love you." Father crying again. Hands cling to hands us, I can feel trapped in my heart of resentment in little ablation, outraged wound healing slowly. From that day on, father never never took a drink. Every day he will extract the bible of some words to let me see, and declared that Jesus stood between him and the wine, bring them forever separately.
Father in the following days has always kept the waking state. He walked out of the wagon center has been and live with me. In his teetotallers the next year, he is drinking survivors have instituted alumni, and an old typewriter print a paper calls for drinking declaration, every month sending 100 portions. He also helped drinking center organized a conference. Annual meeting, hundreds of abstainer and their families get together to celebrate the former "alcoholic" became a sensible man.
My father 67 years old when, become a local hospital volunteers, and for the patient of red delivers newspaper, flowers and encourage topic, also for people who want to go home embrace the baby's birth mother pushed a wheelchair. He has been voluntary work there until he 69 of prostate cancer living in nursing homes so far.
My father didn't because of her cancer and sullen, on the contrary, he saw himself as god sent to the home "angel". He put the new patient unite around themselves, bringing with them in a nursing home, and go sightseeing in every corner of the interesting story happened in tell them. During the holidays, sometimes he phoned and told us: "I'm going to be late return with you together, because here the many people without friends to visit - in the festival, I can't leave any one person alone." My father often said to me: "my dear daughter, this is all love results!"
Father in his 72 years old that year's death. My sister and I thought will have a few people to attend his funeral, but actually came more than a hundred people. Among them, most people are we don't know, these strangers one by one to see their respective about my father's memory speakup Shared with us.
"Is your father made my father became a sober man."
"Is your father made my mother in the nursing home in happily spent the rest of my life."
"In my dad drunk period, is your father made our family together help he quit smoking."
The funeral, and 7 man dressed in red dress volunteers to my father salute. Originally, is father encouraging them to be the hospital volunteers. They mostly has over 70 years old.
I thank my father, because he gave me life, and I didn't have a chance to feel his that should be enough to inspire the world love.
I am sure that, love can change everything.
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